F**k Lindsay Lohan and her huge...

ego.

The top search criteria for this blog is "Lindsay Lohan". All because of one stupid post I made about her.
WTF is it with famous teenagers/ex-Mouseketeers?

Here's what it takes to be a skanky-15-minutes-of-fame-having-one-hit-wonder-selling-can't-sing-live-without-lip-syncing-pop princess?

Got this link from Clara

Happy Halloween

YUCK

To all hospital cafeteria workers...
I realize that I shouldn't expect gourmet food from your establishment...believe me I know. But, is it too much to ask for bread that isn't soggy?
When you make a sandwich, placing 2 ripe slices of tomato and a (wet) piece of lettuce right next to the bread is going to make it WET AND DISGUSTING! Why not wrap the bread in a little plastic wrap? It costs all of 2 cents per yard!
And while I'm on this, isn't chicken "salad" supposed to have something in it besides just canned chicken? I'm not picky. A little mayo, maybe a pickle would do.

Time to start bringing my lunch...

When I know I'm fine, I'm not used to fine.

I'm still riding the retail therapy wave. Newegg.com is sending me a wireless router. eBay is sending me new sheets and a new duvet cover. My therapist would not be happy...but it's gotten me over the one week hump. Now I can settle in and get to work. I have a lot of things planned for the next 4 months or so and with the holidays lurking just around the bend, it's not much time.
Really though, I'm doing a lot better than I was a few days ago. The first and last weeks of a deployment are the ones that are the hardest. The first week or two is spent adjusting to the change of being alone. For me this isn't a huge issue because I was a single mother for 5 and a half years before I got married, but for some it can become a little overwhelming. The last week or two of a deployment is when things start gaining momentum, but they also DRAG on forever. Preparations are made, parties are planned and everything is put in place for THE BIG DAY when they come home and everyone goes into the euphoria that is homecoming.
The last time we went through a deployment, the situation was a lot different and it really distracted me from being able to focus on the homecoming. The last deployment was supposed to be 6 months but ended up being 10 months. I let my loneliness and disappointment take over and we ended up separating for a while because of it. I don't intend for that to happen again. Beyond that, I am absolutely certain that it won't because I'm not going to let it.
Besides, I'll really be too busy painting, refinishing cabinets, and reorganizing to notice that he's gone...well that's the plan anyway...

I'm trying hard to be more "honest" in my blog-writing. Not that I wasn't honest before, but there are a lot of things I held back from posting here because I felt they were too personal. Given my recent writer's block though, I've been thinking that maybe that little bit of personal is what I need to put out there to at least get it out of my head.

Retail therapy

Yesterday I spent 5 hours at Ikea, the world's place to get cheap, but trendy furniture. Nearly 10,000 people also thought this would be a good idea so we all spent the afternoon running into each other and saying "pardon me" and "excuse me".
I really like this lamp I got though.

and this one too...


I got these plus a couple of tables and other various household items. One of the problems with visiting Ikea is that...I want everything in the stupid store. They have little miniature living rooms and kitchens and they make everything look bigger than it actually is. Why is it that they have room to spare for a family of 3 in 632 square feet of space and I 'm struggling to make my family of 3 fit into 967 square feet? stuff fit. I want a loft bed (so i can put my puter desk UNDER it..BRILLIANT...plus it's always better to sleep in the top bunk isn't it?), and one of those comfy POÄNG chairs, and a new closet system, and new kitchen cabinets, and...and...and...I don't need any of it really. Just like I don't need a new laptop. Does that mean I'm not going to buy one? Of course not...

One is the lonliest number.

I'm feeling lonely today. It's been about a week since I've been by myself and I'm not quite adjusted to it yet. I suppose it'll be easier later. I want it to be next year now. I'm a little impatient. I'm not looking forward to all of the holiday crap this year at all. It'll bring up too many bad memories of last year and it'll be miserable. I won't even have enough money to practice retail therapy!
Yeah yeah, poor me...I know that sounds a little pathetic. But I'm working on saying what I feel and right now, that's how I feel.

TODAY IS...

INTERNATIONAL CAPSLOCK DAY!



CELEBRATE! PISS PEOPLE OFF BY TYPING IN ALL CAPS ALL DAY! MAKE THEM THINK YOU'RE SHOUTING! WHAT BETTER WAY TO ADVERTISE THAT YOU'RE A COMPLETE FOOL AND KNOW absolutely nothing ABOUT THE INTERNET?

THERE ARE EVEN PEOPLE arguing ABOUT WHEN IT IS. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?

(THANKS TO BUSBLOG FOR THE LINK)

Operators are standing by

I don't have anything to say today so I thought I would post a few pictures.


Yep that's me...at work...yes I have to wear a silly headset and I look like an AT&T operator.


I took this at the fair a couple of months ago. I thought it made an interesting picture.


This is a picture I took the other day when I borrowed my sister's car. This is what her radio was displaying. The song playing was by the Butthole Surfers, but the radio never showed the Surfers part, it just said Butthole during the whole song.


I can't remember if I showed you this picture yet or not. This is what the elk did to my car. I doesn't look like much, but it cost $1500 to repair. I suppose we got lucky that it didn't total my car or something. Wild life sucks.

Top 5...err 4

Taking a queue from Sloth, I decided I would post my own version of the Top 5 4 movies that are utter crap. (I could only think of 4...)

1. Armegeddon - I dislike when movie makers feel the need to dumb things down for the audience. The scientist guy explains how big the astroid is and, just in case we weren't paying attention, they have to throw in "It's the size of Texas, Mr. President". Although, this probably isn't too far off of what they would say to our current president to make sure he understood what was happening. At least "the size of Texas" is something he is familiar with...
2. Down With Love - This was one of the movie options on my last trans-atlantic flight. I'm a huge Ewan McGregor fan, but he really needs to work on his American southern accent. It was painful. (ditto his accent in Big Fish, though that movie was ok.)
3. Vanilla Sky - Too confusing, too much "oh look at the symbolism", too much hidden/double meaning.
4. Any Austin Powers movie - This isn't a very popular opinion. Everyone seems to love these movies. I rented the first one and fell ASLEEP within the first 15 minutes. Maybe the humor is lost on me. Mike Myers is kind of a funny guy, but I just didn't think any of these movies were worth more than a chuckle or two. Even the funniest of funnies loses it's funny after 3 movies.

Woo and Yay!

Have a look at the story of the Cheese Family!

Tucker Carlson is an asshat

click here to see why...link courtesy of busblog.
Don't forget to check out the oh-so-charming picture of said asshat in the title link. (yes that's a bow tie that he's wearing...is he 70??)
I fucking hate people who can't debate or argue without yelling over you and throwing insults.


There's my daily quota of bad words...whew, I feel better.

Nada cheese sandwich

I tried to convince myself that it was Sunday today (isn't there a song about that?)when the alarm went off but that didn't work out too well. The first hour after my alarm went off went by very slowly though which was nice. Yes...I set my alarm for an hour and a half before I have to actually get up. I don't think this makes it any easier to get up, I just like to lay there for a while before I'm forced to join the living.
I think I sleepwalked (sleptwalked?) too. I let the cat in because she was beating on the door (ok you have to picture her and her little paws beating on the door...doesn't that make you giggle just a little bit??). I was trying to get back into the bed but there were pillows there. I, in my half awake state, was telling them to move over. I somehow thought that the pillows were the person that should be there when, in fact, he is not. (sigh)
I felt ill for most of the weekend so it was full of naps, sleeping in too late, and not much else. I did manage to get back into SWG for a bit, but I wuss'd out at 11pm when I was literally falling asleep in my chair.
Nothing exciting happens to me anymore. I must be in a rut.

Explaining the unexplainable.

Have you ever tried to explain blogging to a non-blogger? The exchange goes something like this:
"So what do you like to read on the Internet?"
"I read blogs."
"Huh?"
"I read blogs."
"What's a blog?"
"It's short for weblog, it's kind of like a diary/journal..."
"a diary? with people's personal thoughts in..."
"no, it's not like that really..."
And so it goes.
Yesterday I had a conversation very similar to the above. I wasn't quite sure how to answer the question of "what is a blog". It's a lot of things really. When you factor in the other things like pictures, comments, trackbacks...I suppose to the "average" Internet user (read: "I use AOL") it might be a bit of a tricky concept to understand.
The fact is that it's brilliant in a lot of ways. Gossip about your family, tell everyone what your favorite music is, share your political beliefs, rant about the idiot that cut you off in traffic that morning...it doesn't really matter what you write about because as long as it's well written there will be someone who will read it. Besides, all we're really doing is sitting at our desks at our jobs trying to pass the time until it's time to go home, right? AM I THE ONLY ONE???
I'm not insinuating, by the way, or trying to suggest in any shape, form, or fashion that anything I write here is the least bit interesting to anyone but myself (or that it's well written for that matter). It's sheer luck that anyone else reads the things I write here. Call it fate...kismet. We were brought together by the powers of the universe...or something like that.

Just 'cause I can...

2 faces of Bush(via a link on David's site)
flip flop(via busblog)

Did anyone watch the debate and see Bush throw a tantrum until he was allowed to respond to a question? Had to laugh also when he referred to the rumors flowing around on the "Internets"...because, you know, there are so many of them...
I guess we should give the guy a break. It's probably the first time he's had to speak in front of a crowd that wasn't hand picked to be only people who supported him...

blah...

All new and improved.

the bigger the better

I think Spamusement is replacing Engrish.com as my favorite place to go to laugh until I pee my pants.

Ahhh that's better.

I love vacation. I love not having to go to work. I love traveling to new places that I haven't been to before. But, I don't love being out of my element. Weird, huh?
There's something nice about taking time off from your normal routine, but there's also something equally nice to come back to it with renewed appreciation. Vacations are great.
Nothing too bad happened while on this trip. It was a lovely 10 or so days of relaxing, driving, napping, eating, and sight-seeing. There were no fights (which is a new thing for me...imagine going on a vacation and not having a fight...it boggles the mind), no crankiness, no wishing I was somewhere else.
We did have a bit of of an adventure at a couple of points. Here is what the directions from MSN said...
71: Road name changes to (S) Kodachrome Dr [S Main St] 2.4 miles
72: Road name changes to Road 400 0.4 miles
73: Road name changes to Cottonwood Rd [Road 400] 43.1 miles
Notice where it says "Road 400". Not US Road 400 or State Road 400,just "Road 400". This would be an unpaved road in the middle of the desert with huge puddles, pot holes, and rocks in the middle of it. This wouldn't be a problem with someone who has a vehicle that, for instance, isn't a VW Golf. For us it was a bit of an off-road, pseudo makeshift 4x4 adventure. It took us 2 hours to travel the 43.1 miles of "Road 400" because we couldn't go faster than about 20mph for fear of seriously messing up my alignment and/or bottoming out going over the huge potholes in the road. Believe me, the warning sign they have about 20 (paved) minutes into "Road 400" that says "Unimproved road ahead" just might be the understatement of the year.
After having successfully navigated the deserts of Utah on "Road 400" we made the rest of the trip without incident...well almost.
Later that night, shortly after entering Grand Canyon National Monument (the park, not the canyon itself) we noticed a sign with a picture of an elk on it. We thought "Great this might be a chance to see some wildlife up close.". Sure enough, a few minutes later we spotted a small group off to the side of the road standing together. We slowed down and looked and then continued on. A little while later we saw another group, this time crossing the road. We stopped this time to let them all pass, not more than about 3 feet in front of the car. When the last one had safely crossed the road we started again, very slowly so we could still look at them. What happened next was kind of in slow motion. The last one climbed the hill on the side of the road, circled back and slammed into the passenger side of the car (where I was sitting). I saw the headlights reflect her eyes, saw her flip over the hood and roll up on to the windsheild. I remember seeing her fur pressed up against the glass of the windshield for a split second, I heard the crunch of the metal of the hood when she landed on it, and being thrown against my seatbelt as the car lurched from the brakes before she rolled off onto the pavement and darted across the road to the other side. She didn't even appear to be hurt! No limping, no blood, nothing. We, however were kind of freaking out. We had just hit an elk! After assessing the damage (in the dark) we assumed all was well because the car was still running and there was nothing noticably different...that is until I tried to get out of the car. The passenger side fender had been pushed in so much that it wedged the door shut. To get out, I had to climb out of the window all Dukes of Hazard style.
The third thing that happened to us was on the way home when we stopped in San Francisco. We had tickets to see Snow Patrol at The Fillmore so we wanted a motel that was close by, not knowing that downtown San Francisco is NOT a place you want to stay if you're unfamiliar with the area. What the pictures don't show you on their site is the mildew in the shower, the holes in the walls, the old man smell in the room that was covered up with some kind of perfumey "air freshner", or the stains on the sheets. I don't ask for much when I stay at a cheap motel. If it's clean, I can usually deal. This one was so dirty we decided to sleep on top of the bedspread so as not to be nestled in with the questionable sheets and mattress (no fitted sheet). YUCK!!
We arrived home, tired from the drive, but glad to finally be home to sleep in a familiar bed, shower with no mildew, and not one elk within at least 10 miles.